Sheldon: Amy, after consideration, I believe we may have acted rashly[轻率地]. I propose we resume[重新开始] our
relationship and attempt to resolve[解决] our differences.
Amy: I'll agree to that only if you'll stipulate[约定] that 80% of our difficulties were caused by you.
Sheldon: I'll go as high as 40.
Amy: Sixty-five.
Sheldon: Done. You understand that moving forward, we deal with the fact that my mother does not approve of you?
Amy: I do. I find being cast in the role of bad girl oddly[古怪地] titillating[令人兴奋的].
Sheldon: Would you like to see my cats?
Amy: I would. I love cats. They're the epitome[典型] of indifference.
Sheldon: Ah, then you may find Zazzles注3 a little cloying[粘人的].
Leonard: I saw what you did there.
Mrs. Cooper: He thinks he's such a smarty-pants[自作聪明的人].
He's no different from any man. You tell 'em not to do something, that's all they want to do.
谢尔顿：她来这里干什么？
库珀太太：我打电话请她来的。
艾米：你妈妈认为你为了我失魂落魄，作为神经生物学家，我感到非常好奇。
谢尔顿：哦，请放心，我的心智完全正常。
莱纳德：（打喷嚏）25只猫！
库珀太太：哦，上帝保佑你，亲爱的。谢尔顿，坐下来吧，我们谈谈。
谢尔顿：好吧，不过你可别想骗我。每次你说我们谈谈，其实就是想让我听你说话。
库珀太太：那就闭嘴。
谢尔顿：是，长官。
库珀太太：我找艾米过来是想看看她是一个什么样的人。跟她聊了一会儿之后，我得说，虽然她确实是一位非常独特的姑娘，但你们俩根本不适合对方。
谢尔顿：这个结论太奇怪了。不管用哪种标准来衡量，艾米都是我认识的人当中与我最相似的。
库珀太太：哦，很抱歉，谢利，我看不出来。
谢尔顿：你看不看得出来没关系。我也看不到亚原子粒子，但不管怎么说，它们都是存在的。
艾米：绝妙的观点。
谢尔顿：这是物理学观点。
艾米：说得好。
库珀太太：别卖弄拉丁语了。你们决定分手是件好事，省得我来拆散你们。
谢尔顿：艾米，经过再三考虑，我认为我们的行动过于草率。我提议我们重归于好，并努力化解我们的分歧。
艾米：如果你认可我们之间80%的问题都是你造成的，我就同意和好。
谢尔顿：我顶多接受40%。
艾米：65%。
谢尔顿：成交。你知道，如果我们继续来往，我们就得面对我妈妈并不认可你这件事吗？
艾米：我明白。我发现扮演坏女孩的角色竟让我十分兴奋。
谢尔顿：你想看看我的猫吗？
艾米：好啊，我喜欢猫。它们是情感淡漠的典范。
谢尔顿：啊，你会发现犀利哥有点粘人。
莱纳德：我可算看出来了。
库珀太太：他自以为聪明绝顶，其实和其他男人没什么不同。你越不让他们做什么，他们就越想那么做。
口语锦囊
“rest assured”一般用于祈使语境，意思是“请放心”，例如：
Rest assured / You can rest assured that we will do all we can. （请放心，我们会尽力而为。）
西方人听见别人打喷嚏总会说一句“God bless you”或“Bless you”——欧美风俗里相信人在打喷嚏时会灵魂出窍，让恶魔找到可乘之机，所以要用这句话来驱邪。发展到今天，这种用法多表示希望对方身体健康，而且使用者一般为信教人士。如果遇到外国朋友对你说“bless you”，记得回答一句“thank you”哦！
“touché”源自法语，用于承认对方的论据正确或反驳有力，意思是“说得好”——在这段对话中，库珀太太把这个词误认为拉丁语了。
注3：“zazzle”在美国俚语中表示“性感”，是比较夸张的黑人用语。此处译名沿用网上翻译版本。
一天道别时，艾米突然请谢尔顿和她的母亲见面，谢尔顿慌了……
Sheldon: Leonard, Leonard, Leonard...
Leonard: Yeah, what?
Sheldon: Amy Farrah Fowler has asked me to meet her mother.
Leonard: Yeah, so?
Sheldon: What does that mean?
Leonard: Well, you know how you're always saying that Amy is a girl who's your friend and not your girlfriend?
Sheldon: Uh-huh.
Leonard: You can't say that anymore.
Sheldon: What?!
Leonard: Look, she obviously wants to take your relationship to the next level.
Sheldon: I don't want the next level. I like this level. Fix it for me!
Leonard: Me? How am I supposed to fix it?
Sheldon: Simple! You want a girlfriend; Amy wants to be someone's girlfriend. Take her off my hands. I give you my blessing.
Leonard: That is insane[疯狂的].
Sheldon: You're right. It would never work. Amy finds you tedious[乏味的].
Leonard: Okay, good luck.
Sheldon: …Wait! What am I supposed to do?
Leonard: Have you considered telling her how you feel?
Sheldon: Leonard, I'm a physicist, not a hippie[嬉皮士].
Leonard: All right, well, let me see if I can explain your situation using physics. What would you be if you were attached to another object by an inclined plane[斜面] wrapped helically[成螺旋形地] around an axis[轴]?
Sheldon: Screwed.
Leonard: There you go. (He leaves.)
Sheldon: Amy's right. He is tedious.
谢尔顿：莱纳德，莱纳德，莱纳德……
莱纳德：啊，干嘛？
谢尔顿：艾米·法拉赫·福勒让我见她母亲。
莱纳德：是吗，那怎么了？
谢尔顿：那是什么意思？
莱纳德：哦，你不是总说艾米只是你的女性朋友而不是女朋友吗？
谢尔顿：对啊。
莱纳德：你再也不能这么说了。
谢尔顿：什么？！
莱纳德：你瞧，显然她想让你们的关系更进一步。
谢尔顿：我不想更进一步，我喜欢现在这步。帮我搞定它！
莱纳德：我？我怎么帮你搞定？
谢尔顿：很简单！你想要女朋友，艾米想当别人的女朋友。我把她让给你，我会祝福你们的。
莱纳德：你疯了。
谢尔顿：你说得对，这行不通。艾米觉得你很乏味。
莱纳德：好吧，祝你好运。
谢尔顿：等等！我该怎么办？
莱纳德：你有没有想过把自己的感受告诉她？
谢尔顿：莱纳德，我是物理学家，不是嬉皮士。
莱纳德：好吧，哦，让我想想看能不能用物理学解释你的处境。如果你和另外一个物体绑在一起，放到一个围绕轴心呈螺旋状的斜面上，你的下场会如何？
谢尔顿：拧在一块儿完蛋了。
莱纳德：就是这样。（他出门了。）
谢尔顿：艾米说得对，他确实很乏味。
口语锦囊
“screw”作动词用时，其本义有“拧紧，揉作一团”的意思；而“screwed”在俚语中则表示某人处境糟糕，“完蛋了”——莱纳德用一个生动的例子巧妙地将这两个义项糅合在一起。
谢尔顿千方百计地逃避艾米，结果还是被逮住了……
Amy: I believe a misunderstanding may have occurred when I asked you to meet my mother.
Sheldon: No misunderstanding. I've learned what that request actually mean
and I don't want to be joined to another object by an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis. Amy: In what way are you screwed? All I want to do is present you as my boyfriend to my mother so she'll be satisfied that I'm in a relationship.
Sheldon: So we'd be perpetrating[犯] a ruse?
Amy: Precisely.
Sheldon: And you haven't fallen hopelessly in love with me?
Amy: Don't be absurd[荒谬的]. I find the notion of romantic love to be an unnecessary cultural construct that adds no value to human relationships.
Sheldon: Amy Farrah Fowler, that's the most pragmatic[务实的] thing anyone has ever said to me.
Amy: I trust this clarification allows us to return to boy/friend/girl/friend status.
Sheldon: Of course. Would you like to join me for Chinese food?
Amy: Sheldon, please, you're suffocating[闷死] me.
Sheldon: My apologies. Good night, Amy.
Amy: Good night, Sheldon.
艾米：对我要求你见我妈妈这件事，我想你可能有些误会。
谢尔顿：我没误会。我了解到那个要求意味着什么。我可不想在一个围绕轴心呈螺旋状的斜面上和别的物体绞在一起。
艾米：你怎么会完蛋了？我只是想把你当作