Friday night had rolled around again and Anna and Christine were decorating the Christmas tree and arguing about curfew[儿童晚间必须在家的时间]…again. “Mom! You are so old-fashioned. My friends stay out until one.”
“What do you do until one o’clock in the morning?” Christine asked. “You’re not old enough to go to clubs, you can’t drink, you can barely even drive…” After a moment of hesitation she added, “I’ve just experienced some things I don’t want you to go through, but I’m going to trust you. You can stay out until one tonight, but absolutely no later! I want you in bed at 1:05. That gives you five minutes to get into the house and get in bed.”
“Thanks Mom! You’re the greatest!” she said, giving her mom a hug. Anna didn’t give a second thought to her mom’s past.
Anna’s best friend, Daphne, was in the driveway at 9:30 pm honking[按喇叭] on the horn as usual.
“I’ll be home at one,” Anna said. “Thanks again, Mom. I love you.” She leaned over and kissed her mom on the cheek.
“I love you, too. Have fun.” Anna practically ran out the front door. She’s so full of life and energy, Christine thought. And I am not going to sit around all night worrying about her. She popped a movie in and settled down on the couch, looking forward to a quiet, relaxing evening at home.
Anna hopped into the passenger side of Daphne’s car with a huge grin[咧着嘴笑] on her face and screamed, “I’ve just got my curfew extended!” Then she leaned over and turned the radio up. Their favorite song was playing. The two girls belted out[大声唱] every word at the top of their lungs.
Christine had put in a second movie and was finally getting in to it when the phone rang. She paused the movie and grabbed the cordless[无线的] phone. “Hello? …OH…MY…GOD! …I’ll be right there.”
Christine pulled up in front of County General
Hospital. She’d made it there in record time. This isn’t right, she thought as she parked her car and headed for the entrance. She rushed in, unaware of the tears streaming down her face.
Christine headed for the double doors that lead to the ER[即Emergency Room]. She entered Room 105 with her heart in her throat[提心吊胆]. A nurse was leaning over a heart monitor, adjusting the controls. Christine glanced at her daughter. A pale-faced little girl with a bandage[绷带] on her head laid there in a bed that looked ten times bigger than her body.
The ER nurse on duty turned around when she heard Christine come in. “I’m so sorry. They were hit by a drunk driver,” she said. “The other car hit the passenger side. Anna’s in an induced[诱导] coma[昏迷], and she has swelling[肿胀] in her brain.
Dr. Harland induced the coma to try and bring the swelling down.”
Christine pulled a chair close to her daughter’s bed and held her hand. “I love you so much, baby.” She squeezed her hand three times, their family symbol for “I love you.” Then she put her head down on the bed and wept. She sat up suddenly when she thought she felt three squeezes back. She did it again. There was no response this time, but she knew she had felt it. “I’m right here, baby. Wake up, please, wake up…”
Christine spent every waking moment with Anna for the next two weeks, talking to her, singing to her, praying for her, and crying for her. It was Christmas Eve and Christine had decorated Anna’s room with lights and a miniature[小型的] tree. She turned on the radio and tuned into a station playing Christmas carols.
She sat down in the chair next to Anna’s bed. “I need to tell you something, honey,” she began. “On the night when you were born, I started having labor pains[阵痛] at around 10:00. I woke your father up, got all our stuff together and we drove for the hospital. It was dark and rainy and the roads were slippery[滑的]. We were in an accident that night. He hit another car head on when he swerved[突然转向] into the wrong lane. He killed the other driver.” Christine was crying so hard she was barely able to finish her story.
“Your father was killed as well. The cops and ambulances showed up and they rushed me to the hospital.
You were born two hours later. I’ve never had a better or worse night in my life. You entered it and I lost your father. I’ve never been able to get over the guilt I’ve felt for that night. And now…here you are, lying here. Hit by a drunk driver. Why couldn’t it have been anything else, anyone else?” Christine was worn out. She’d never told her daughter that story. She’d always felt too ashamed.
It had felt good to let it out. She put her head down on the bed. Her tears were gone for now. All that was left to do was pray. She held her baby’s hand and squeezed it three times.
“I…love…you…too, Mom,” Anna answered. Christine looked up, amazed.
“Oh, Anna. You’re awake. Oh, baby, I was so scared!”
“I’m okay, Mom,” she answered quietly. “Mom? I think we should move my curfew back to 11:30.” Christine started laughing…and crying.
She had an amazing daughter.
“Anna, I have so much to tell you…”
安娜因为母亲老把自己当作小孩而厌烦不已。她的母亲似乎并不明白六岁和十六岁的区别。安娜的母亲克里斯汀则讨厌总被女儿视为敌人。为什么安娜总是不能理解她?她只是不希望女儿经历自己曾经遭受的痛苦和心痛。当然了,她羞于向安娜讲述自己的过去。
又是一个周五晚上,安娜和克里斯汀正在装饰圣诞树,再一次为安娜晚上应该几点回家而吵了起来。
“妈妈,你真老土!我的朋友们全都玩到一点才回家。”
“你们玩什么要玩到凌晨一点?”克里斯汀问。“你还小,不能去酒吧,你也不能上夜店,甚至还不懂开车……”她犹豫了一会儿,接着说:“我经历过一些事情,不希望你重蹈覆辙,但我相信你。今晚你可以玩到凌晨一点,但绝对不能再晚了!我要你1:05就躺在床上,那
五分钟是给你进屋子并上床的。”
“谢谢妈妈!你最棒了!”她一边拥抱母亲一边说,却没有多想母亲提到的往事。
安娜最好的朋友戴芬妮跟往常一样,晚上9点半在车道上按响汽车喇叭。
“一点钟我就回家,”安娜说。“再次谢谢你,妈妈。我爱你。”她把身子靠过去吻了吻母亲的脸颊。
“我也爱你。玩得开心。”安娜几乎是跑着出门的。她总是那么活力充沛,克里斯汀想。我可不想一整晚干坐着为她担心。她将一张影碟放进机子里,安坐在沙发上,期待一个安静而轻松的夜晚。
安娜跳上戴芬妮那小车的副驾驶座上,咧着嘴大笑,高声说:“我的‘放风’时间延长咯!” 然后她倾身把收音机的音量调大。广播正播放着她们最喜爱的歌曲。两个女孩用力吼出每一句歌词。
克里斯汀正在看第二部电影,终于有点投入了。这时电话铃响了。她暂停了电影,抓起无线电话说:“喂?……天……啊……我马上到!”
克里斯汀把车开到县立综合医院门前。她以破纪录的速度赶到这里。这不是真的,她一边想着,一边停好车后朝入口走去。她冲了进去,完全没有意识到自己已经泪流满面。
克里斯汀走向通往急救室的双开门,进入105房,心跳到了嗓子眼里。一位护士正俯身看着心脏监护器,调整控制设置。克里斯汀望向女儿。瘦小的女儿脸色苍白,头上扎着绷带,躺在一张看上去比她身体大十倍的病床上。
值班的急救室护士看到克里斯汀进来后,转过身来对她说:“很遗憾,她们被一个醉驾司机撞到了。肇事车撞上了副驾驶座。安娜现在处于诱导式昏迷状态,她的大脑里有肿块。哈兰德医生对她进行诱导式昏迷,尝试消肿。”
克里斯汀拉了一张椅子靠着女儿的床坐下,握住她的手。“我真的很爱你,宝贝。”她轻轻地握了握女儿的手三次,这是他们家表达“我爱你”的方式,然后低头抵着床哭了起来。她猛地坐了起来,因为她感觉到女儿给了她三次轻握的回应。于是她再轻握了三下。这次没有回应,但是她知道女儿能感觉得到。“我就在这儿,宝贝。醒醒,求你了,快醒醒……”
接下来的两个星期,
克里斯汀一起床就片刻不离地守着安娜,对她说话,给她唱歌,为她祈祷,也为她哭泣。圣诞前夜到了,克里斯汀用小灯和一棵迷你圣诞树装饰安娜的病房。她打开收音机,调到一个正在播放圣诞颂歌的频道。
她在安娜床边的椅子上坐了下来。“我要告诉你一件事,甜心,”她开始说道。“在你出生那晚,我十点左右开始出现阵痛。我叫醒你的父亲,收拾好物品后便开车前往医院。那时天很黑,下着雨,路面湿滑。那晚我们遇到了交通事故。他突然变道,进错车道了,撞上另一辆车的车头——他撞死了那个司机。”克里斯汀哭得很厉害,几乎没办法继续说下去。
“你父亲也因此丧生。警察和救护车赶到现场,把我送进医院。两个小时后,你出生了。我这辈子从未经历过这么一个大喜大悲的夜晚。你来到了人世,同时我却失去了你父亲。我一直无法忘掉那天晚上带来的罪恶感。而现在……你躺在这里,被一个醉酒驾驶的司机撞到了。为什么不是其他事情,为什么不是其他人呢?”克里斯汀已经筋疲力尽了,她从未向女儿说过这件事。她一直觉得非常惭愧。
把所有事情都说出来让她感觉舒服多了。她低下头靠着病床,眼泪早已流干。她只能祈祷了。她握着心肝宝贝的手,轻轻地捏了三下。
“我……也……爱……你,妈妈,”安娜回答道。克里斯汀抬起头,惊喜万分。
“噢,安娜。你醒了。噢,宝贝,我被你吓坏了!”
“我没事,妈妈,”她轻声回答。“妈妈?我想我们还是把‘放风’时间改回到11点半吧。”克里斯汀笑了起来……也落下了眼泪。她有一个了不起的女儿。
“安娜,我有很多事情想告诉你……”