“Do you realize what you’ve done? I don’t have any shoes—you ate them all!” Yes, I was screaming at a dog, but I was sleep-deprived and my frustration got the best of19) me. I threw myself on the couch, tears streaming down my face. For once, Mocha stayed put20).
“这是什么?”我问她,并朝那堆乱糟糟的东西走过去。
被咬得乱七八糟的碎皮革和鞋带在地毯上散了一地。我的一只运动鞋的鞋跟被咬得七零八落,还有我那双全新的罗马鞋的鞋底也被咬得乱七八糟,客厅其他家具下面到处散落着碎屑。
“你都干了些什么?”我大叫,希望她能给我个解释。我迅速冲到楼上,来到卧室,结果发现衣橱旁边那堆要洗的脏衣服明显有被翻过的痕迹。我的另一只运动鞋被扔在一边,幸免于难。
我突然意识到,摩卡一定是把我藏在衣橱后面的那五双鞋都翻出来肆虐了一番,并以此为乐。想到这儿,我只觉血往脸上涌,气得双颊直发烫。我那双崭新的亮面凉鞋、一双后绑带坡跟鞋、一双红色漆皮芭蕾平底鞋、一双罗马鞋、一双运动鞋,还有我的游泳裤,都被她毁得面目全非。
我气冲冲地跑下楼,站在摩卡跟前——这时候她已经在楼梯底下蹲着了。
“你竟然吃了我的鞋!”我朝她大吼,气愤地用食指指着她的脸。她一动也没动。
“你知不知道你都干了些什么?我没鞋可穿了——你把它们都吃了!”是的,我在朝一只狗大喊大叫,但天晓得我连觉都没得睡,那一刻挫败感彻底击溃了我。我一下子扑到沙发上,眼泪刷地流了出来,顺着脸颊往下淌。摩卡还是待在原地没动,这可是破天荒头一回。
As the reality of the situation began to set in, so did the fear about all that Mocha had eaten: leather, shoelaces, plastic—these couldn’t be good for a dog. I jumped off the couch, stuffed my pocket with plastic bags, grabbed her leash and took her into the nearby woods for what would be the first of many trips throughout the evening, each leaving more evidence of what had occurred that day.
I’ll admit that for the rest of my stay with Mocha, I never gave her any more affection than a pat on the head. I was bitter, resentful and disappointed that my first attempt at dog ownership had failed. I wasn’t cut out21) for the lifestyle and sacrifices that come with having a dog. Early-morning and late-night walks, destruction of property and a lingering pooch22) smell on my clothing were not big sellers.
And so I learned my lesson, and will settle for being close friends with a dog owner. I can get my fix whenever the pang of envy occurs, then return home to my sleeping, boring, fat cat. She may not play fetch, but at least she doesn’t have the same taste in chew toys.
慢慢地,我回过神来,开始接受眼前发生的一切,这时我也开始担心摩卡吃的那些东西:皮革、鞋带、塑料——这些都不是狗该吃的东西。我跳下沙发,往口袋里塞了几个塑料袋,一把抓起拴在她颈上的皮带,带着她去了附近的树林,而这不过是当晚的第一次树林散步。那天晚上,我们来来回回地往树林里跑了好多回,每一回都留下了些证据,证明摩卡那天都吃了些什么。
我承认,在那之后和摩卡住在一起的日子里,我没有给过她更多的关爱,最多也就是拍拍她的脑袋。这是我第一次试着养狗,结果却以失败告终,这让我感到既痛苦又愤怒,还对自己感到失望透顶。我没法适应养狗所带来的生活方式的改变和所需要付出的牺牲。一大清早就要带她去散步,深更半夜还得陪她出去遛弯儿,她会破坏家里的东西,而且我的衣服上还总是有一股散不去的狗味,所有这些对我来说一点吸引力都没有。
这次的经历让我吸取了教训,我决定以后还是别养狗了,有几个养狗的好朋友就行了。每次当我看到别人养狗心生妒忌时,我也能很快调整好心态,然后回家接着伺候我那只整天睡觉、无精打采的肥猫。她也许不会玩捡东西的游戏,但至少她也同样不会对那些咀嚼玩具(译者注:供动物们磨牙玩耍的玩具,文中还暗指常被狗当做咀嚼玩具来玩的物品)感兴趣。
1. puppy [5pQpI] n. (常指未满一岁的)小狗
2. settle for:满足于
3. pang [pAN] n. 剧痛,悲痛
4. lab:即Labrador retriever,拉布拉多猎犬,一种中大型犬类,性情温和、活泼好动、聪明听话、容易训练、忠实主人。
5. kibble [5kIbl] n. 磨成粗粒的食物
6. waddle [5wCdl] vi. 摇摇摆摆地行走,蹒跚而行
7. full-on:(表最大程度)完全的
8. workout [5wE:kaut] n. 锻炼,训练
9. tag [tA^] n. (儿童的)捉人游戏
10. it [It] n. (捉迷藏等游戏的) 捉人者,找人者
11. twitch [twItF] vi. 抽搐,抽动
12. be up to sth.:(偷偷地)忙于……;密谋……
13. loveseat:双人小沙发
14. gladiator sandals:罗马鞋,也称为角斗士鞋,是一款以各种漆皮或各种彩色皮质拼接并带有精致绑带设计的女鞋。
15. rummage [5rQmIdV] vt. 到处翻寻,搜出
16. sling-back:鞋后帮呈带状的
17. patent [5peItnt, 5pAtnt] n. (=patent leather)漆皮,漆革
18. shake one’s finger in sb.’s face:用手指指点某人,以表示威胁、警告、责备
19. get the best of:击败,战胜
20. put [put] adj. 固定不动的
21. cut out:安排,计划,派定,规定
22. pooch [pu:tF] n.〈美俚〉狗